FEAR VS. RESPECT: Why the Debate?

After tackling submission and cooperation in my last post, I thought it would be helpful to shed some insight on fear and respect. Many professionals tip toe around these words with statements like, "You don't want your horse to fear you, but you do want him to respect you." Sounds lovely, but it also sounds like a debate...as if there is something wrong with one and something right with the other. I think riders should understand that horses see right with both.

To gain clarity, it's helpful to look first at the definitions of the two words. Fear is a distressing emotion aroused by impending danger or pain. For protective purposes, Mother Nature endowed horses and humans with the ability to both feel fear and arouse fear in others. That capacity is a crucial part of the emotional guidance systems for both species, a part that helps protect us from harm.

Respect, on the other hand, is esteem for the worth of a being and offering proper courtesy. True, deep-down respect comes from understanding and appreciating the whole of a being, not just the parts with which we are initially comfortable.

Many people are comfortable with the gentle side of the horse's nature...but not so much the horse's stronger side, the side that causes them to feel fear. Quite often when horses start biting, kicking or threatening people, folks start thinking something is wrong with them. The horses' value starts to plummet...in people's minds anyway, but certainly not in the horses'.

One of the most interesting things about horses is that their own respect for themselves is always in tact. There's no reason for it not to be. Horses don't teach each other there is anything shameful with any of them, so they never learn to doubt or question their own self-worth. In that regard, horses do not need us to hold them in high esteem to feel good about themselves.

I believe this is what draws us to them, and other animals, more than anything else. It's refreshing, uplifting, and often a huge relief being in the presence of creatures that really, truly like themselves. There is a ton of worry associated with destroying that spirit but, as far as I can tell, humans do not have that capability. 

We do, however, have the ability to misinterpret horse behavior. Horses that steam-roll their humans are often seen as spoiled...as having no respect. That's not the case at all. They are actually showing respect to their humans by bullying them. They do the same with other horses for two reasons:

1. As prey animals, horses are driven by instinct to gain the strength and speed needed to defend themselves from predators.
2. As herd animals, they are driven to help other members of the herd learn to defend themselves as well. Horses neither get nor give free passes on this because individual accountability makes for a strong herd.

Horses can sense a weak link like nobody's business. And when they do, they provide those herd members (whether horse or human!) opportunities to learn how to stand up for themselves. It is not disrespect. It is schooling. Humans who step up to the challenge become an asset to the herd. Those who don't remain a hindrance...and have no idea the stress and anxiety they cause their horses.

I think professionals in this industry can alleviate much of that stress by debating less and clarifying more. Nothing wrong with saying straight up, "It is perfectly reasonable to cause a horse to feel fear of you in necessary defense of your own body. Horses can handle it. They know there is something fierce in you. They need to know it is fierce enough to protect them. They will never come to fear you for it."

Folks who start realizing this do not all of the sudden begin gaining respect from horses. The horses' respect has been there all along. What they gain is an understanding and appreciation for the stronger side of their own nature...thus a deeper respect for the whole of the horse's nature as well.

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SUBMISSION IS NOT A DIRTY WORD

The word submission is getting a lot of flack in the horse world these days. Even some well-renowned trainers are expressing distaste for it. To me, that's like hearing folks who are savoring delicious warm apples baked inside a flaky pastry shell claim they don't like pie. Perhaps the word submission is misunderstood.

Concepts of beating or forcing horses into submission no doubt creates aversion to the word. Yet, submission itself, the act of yielding oneself to the power or authority of another, should not be looked upon with degradation. Submission is not a dirty word...and it is too important a part of cooperative relationships for us to be turning it into one. 

When partners have differing opinions, one of them must submit...to defer to the other's judgment...for the team to move forward cooperatively. If my horse and I are out on a trail and a bear should happen to come creeping out of the woods, you better believe I'm going to submit to my horse's leadership and allow him to get us the hell out of there as fast as he can. But, if my horse is telling me he's concerned about a bicycler peddling toward us, I want him to submit to me and allow me to guide him calmly past the bike. 

It's not an unreasonable request. If I've spent some time proving to him I can make good decisions about our safety, I can reasonably expect my horse to grant me his submission. Horses are reasonable creatures. They are willing to submit to all kinds of things when asked in a reasonable manner, just like you and I. 

Horses know very well that without submission there is no cooperation. It's understandable that folks would be uncomfortable with the word if they think horses are the only ones doing the submitting. Oh, no, no. Horses are masters of art of cooperative social interaction, which is why they unashamedly challenge humans to submit to them as well. 

Most assuredly yielding to a horse's power starts by not freaking out or getting upset over any behaviors it might present. It's all normal horse behavior. As for yielding to a horse's authority? That beautiful journey begins the moment you first realize your horse just taught you something. 

In the give and take of healthy relationships, submission is the give part. It is a gift all riders should become comfortable offering, asking for, and accepting...gracefully. All the great trainers figure this out. That's what makes them great.

Perhaps those who are now hating on the word are just not consciously aware of how much submission of their own is poured into their exquisitely harmonious relationships with horses. Rather than expressing distaste for the word, they would do better to help riders gain clarity it. Submission is the gift exchange that creates cooperative partnerships. Ain't nothing ugly about that.

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Good Times With the Budweiser Clydesdales

When the Budweiser Clydesdales rolled into town last week, Thomet Stables got the privilege of hosting them, as they have on other occasions. (I think this was the fourth time in the years that I've been there.) Seeing them on TV is one thing, but seeing them at the barn where my own horses are stabled is positively delightful. I thought I'd share a bit about the experience, plus some pics I've taken over the years.

When the Clydesdales arrive, there's always a crowd on hand to watch them unload. It cracks me up that some folks confess to seeing the convoy of Budweiser semi-trucks pull off the highway, and then ditching their plans to follow them to find out where they're going. Some things are worth being late for work!

During their visits, the Thomets open the doors to the public, welcoming all who want to get a close-up glimpse of these giant beauties. Folks of all ages stream in throughout the day, giving the barn a lively, festive feel. Those who come by early enough can watch the Clydesdales out in the arena during play time...

 ...which quite often turns into grooming time.

My favorite part is watching the always friendly, always professional grooms get the horses ready for their public appearances. 

And then there's nothing like heading downtown to see them in their full regalia.

There is no denying that the Budweiser Clydesdales have us in the palm of their hooves.

Their enormous size and power combined with their incredible beauty speaks to so many of us on so many different levels. It doesn't hurt that they have veritable marketing geniuses in their corner. Seriously, what other television commercials do we actually look forward to watching? 

Given their ties to the repeal of prohibition, these horses surely symbolize for many the American spirit... or at least the idea that free people in a free country do not necessarily need governmental input concerning their beverage choices. 



The Budweiser Clydesdales are most certainly the perfect representatives for good times. They remind us to lighten up. Life truly should be a party... 

...and it's a lot more fun when horses (and dogs) are invited.

15 Minutes Crucial to Riding Students

Each week, before climbing in the saddle for her riding lesson, nine-year old Audrey spends several minutes working with her horse on the ground. Ask her why and she'll tell you, "To make sure he's calm and paying attention to me." If you think the time she spends doing this isn't crucial, think again. 

In those moments on the ground, Audrey is getting a feel for her horse's mood that day. If he seems distracted, she is learning how to help him focus. If he seems sluggish, she is learning how to rev up his energy. If her horse seems anxious, she is learning how to calm him down. She is developing good leadership skills, while building a trusting bond with the horse. Most importantly, Audrey is practicing making good decisions for her both her own safety and her horse's. 

Recently Audrey was riding in a semi-private lesson when her horse alerted to a commotion outside the arena and came to a sudden halt. She attempted to press him forward but the horse starting getting nervous. Beginning to feel a bit nervous herself, Audrey hopped down and took the horse through several exercises to calm and refocus the both of them. When she climbed back in the saddle, she was able to ride safely past the commotion which was still underway.

In comparison, it wasn't that long ago that I witnessed a seventeen year-old prepare for a riding lesson by walking her horse into the arena and climbing immediately into the saddle. Within seconds her horse took off, bolting full-speed for several harrowing laps around the arena before she managed to get him to stop. When the instructor arrived moments later and asked the shaken teenager what happened, she replied, "I don't know. He just took off. I could tell he was a little nervous when I was getting on, but I didn't expect that."

She probably would have seen it coming a mile away had she received the leadership education Audrey's been receiving. It's no fluke that one horse bolted and the other one didn't. Leadership education is the difference between a rider who is prepared to prevent a horse from panicking and one who isn't. It's the difference between a rider who solves behavior issues and a rider who has no idea she is causing them.

Ask Audrey what's her most important job as an equestrian and she'll tell you, "To keep myself and my horse safe." She knows the fun she has riding depends on it. I'm not sure what the seventeen year-old's answer would be, but I do know this: the longer she remains in riding lessons without developing some decent leadership skills, the greater her chances of getting injured.

It doesn't have to take more than 15 minutes per lesson to help students develop good leadership skills. But, for leadership education to become normal in lesson programs, it most certainly takes riding instructors, students (of all ages) and parents understanding how crucial those 15 minutes are. 

Please join the challenge to create a safer riding lesson industry.

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TALK YOURSELF OUT OF FEAR AND INTO CONFIDENCE

When Emma arrived at the barn for her first lesson with me, she was beyond scared of horses. She was so terrified of them a huge part of her wanted to turn around and go home before we even got started. A handful of harrowing experiences had already taught her just how dangerous horses can be. Emma didn't need me painting a rosy picture for her. What she needed was for me to validate her concerns, and then provide her an arsenal of tools to help her take good care of herself. Doubting she has that ability is what caused her fear in the first place.

Fear is something everyone can relate to, even the seemingly fearless. Case in point, a phenomenal horseman I knew ages ago had a small barn cat he loved immensely. One cold winter morning, he started up his truck having no idea the cat had crawled into the warm engine during the night to sleep. Sadly, turning the key killed the little cat...and brought that brave, confident cowboy so much heartache he couldn't bring himself to even pet another cat for fear of falling in love with one again. Fear is fear, and we all embrace it out of self-preservation because we don't like pain...whether emotional or physical.

Let's face it, getting bitten and stepped on by horses hurts. Falling off horses hurts. Getting bucked off horses hurts even more. Emma's got good reason to fear horses because they can hurt her very easily. But, at ten years old, Emma has already figured out that what's going to hurt the most is denying herself the kind of life she wants to live. When I asked her why she chose to stay that first day despite being so scared, she said, "Because I love horses. They are my favorite animal and there's this side of me that just doesn't want to give up."

There's no worse feeling for a horse lover than that of being afraid of horses. If you're in that spot, you know exactly what I'm talking about. But honestly, that pit in your stomach is not meant to stay there permanently. Fear is simply a warning telling you to proceed with caution, but for heaven's sake, proceed. For your own happiness.

To find her happiness with horses, Emma's got to be able to hold her own among them. She is beginning to discover just how capable she is of doing that... of preventing horses from pushing her around and freaking her out. She is also learning how to prevent herself from freaking out horses. Horses don't tolerate dramatics from frightened riders, and instructors don't do students any favors not sharing that info from the get go.

No matter how frightened she feels, Emma knows it is one hundred percent on her to keep herself calm. Nobody else can do that for her. She's getting pretty darn good at talking herself out of fear and into confidence. Literally. You should hear her...

"I can keep myself calm. I can take deep breaths to keep myself calm. I can sing and laugh and say dumb, funny stuff to keep myself calm. Charlie is a well-trained horse but if I act like I'm scared I will freak him out. I will be fine. Nelly will be right by my side, and she will stay by my side until I feel more confident."

You should hear her after she's done something she was scared to do...

"That didn't kill me. It didn't even hurt me. I am perfectly fine. Charlie is perfectly fine. I did it. It was really scary, but I did it!" 

You should hear her when she is attempting something new...

"I can do this. I've already done lots of other stuff I was afraid to do and now I'm not afraid to do those things any more, and that feels really good. Soon I will not be afraid to do this either. Charlie is counting on me to keep myself calm and I can. I know I can!"

Last night, Emma tacked up Charlie, lead him into the arena, did some ground work with him, and then mounted and rode on her own (off the lunge line) at the walk and trot. 

Considering less than two months ago she was terrified to put a halter on him, the difference is astounding. Surely the main contributing factor is the conversations Emma has been having with herself. I'm delighted she's having them out loud because it is an incredibly powerful way for her to connect with her true self, that larger part of her that knows she is perfectly capable of becoming the horse woman she wants to be. Plus, it's enormous fun for me listening to this young rider squash, one by one, every single doubt she has about her ability to take care of herself. 

Fear is the only thing standing in the way of dreams, and it rears its ugly head anytime we doubt our abilities. If you are doubting yours, I hope Emma inspires you to start talking more positively to yourself...out loud, if needed. Sometimes that's what it takes to drown out the voice of doubt.

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NEVER MIND THE HORSE, HOW BOMB-PROOF ARE YOU?

If you think a bomb-proof horse is your ticket to safe riding, you are probably in for an unpleasant surprise. That's because the scariest thing most horses encounter are riders who think horses are supposed to keep them safe. No amount of bomb-proofing prepares horses for that. Between you and your horse, you are the one who is supposed to be keeping the two of you safe...not the other way around. So, never mind the horse. How bomb-proof are you?

Before going any further, I want to make it clear that folks who think bomb-proofing is about desensitizing horses have it all wrong. To desensitize a horse you'd have to stick ear plugs in its ears, slap blinders on it, or do some such thing that actually dulls its senses.

Bomb-proof horses haven't been de-sensitized at all. Rather, they have been made sensitive to the fact that a human is willing and able to keep them safe. Relieving horses of that responsibility is what allows them to behave calmly despite all kinds of crazy distractions. Whether or not a bomb-proof horse behaves calmly for you depends entirely upon you letting him know that you are willing to do the same.

While going through the bomb-proofing process, horses get used to enjoying the type of calm, assured leadership that helps them get over their drama and find confidence in themselves. Horses thriving in that positive energy aren't necessarily chomping at the bit to carry around riders who carry nervous, fretful energy. If you are one of them, you need to know that even the most bomb-proof horse will eventually protest and challenge you to get over your own drama.

Even if you are not the nervous type, you can expect bomb-proof horses to offer you subtle challenges anyway. If you are unaware of how or why horses do this, you are unaware of the leadership horses need from you to behave calmly for you. You're certainly not alone. Most riders learn how to ride but learn next to nothing about how to get horses to behave calmly. Crazy but true...hence the reason I encourage riding instructors to join the challenge to create a safer industry.

Far too many riders miss out on receiving a basic, yet pretty freakin' important, leadership education. It's a good bet you are one of them if you're thinking the "bomb-proof" horse you recently brought home must have been drugged when you tried it out. Before you're tempted to accuse the seller of misrepresenting the horse, know that it is highly likely you are misinterpreting the situation.

Never take bomb-proof horses for granted. Not only is your safety your responsibility, but for a horse to carry you safely you've got let him know you have his back as well. Learn to provide your bomb-proof horse some bomb-proof leadership. That's your ticket to safe riding!

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SLOWING DOWN THE TOO SPEEDY CANTER

Lunging sessions work wonders for helping horses understand that cantering is a balancing act, not a rush job. But you can’t just send a speedy horse out on the lunge line and expect him to get it. You have to mix things up quite a bit to get the horse to think about slowing down and carrying himself in a balanced manner. This exercise is a good example. So, if your horse's canter is more like a gallop to the finish line, you might want to give it a try. 

Set Up: On a lunge circle, set up a jump with the pole about 1 1/2 to 2 feet high on the outside and resting on the ground on the inside. Note: in the first step of this exercise, you will be only be using the three-quarters of the lunge circle that does not include the jump.

Step One: Trot your horse toward the jump, but rather than sending him over it, ask him to halt, turn toward you, back up 3 steps, and then change direction. (Hopefully, you have already taught your horse to back up when you jiggle the lunge line. If not, now is a good time to start.) 

Keep up this part of the exercise until your horse is performing it calmly and rhythmically. If he gets excited and breaks into his normal speedy canter, spiral him down to you as quickly as possible to encourage him to stay at the trot.

Step Two: Begin asking for the change of direction as your horse is backing up. This will get him sitting down a bit on his hind end and lifting his shoulders up and away from you as he turns around. It’s like getting your horse to do a little rollback on the lunge line, and it effectively gets him re-balancing himself each time he changes directions.

Here Kelly is asking Milo to simply change directions.

Here Kelly asks Milo to change directions while backing up. Note how
he must lift his shoulders up and away from her to make the change. 

Once you get the little rollback during the changes of direction, and your horse is handling everything calmly, proceed to the next step.

Step Three: Start trotting your horse over the jump, but continue asking for a change of direction (with the little rollback) after each crossing. Ideally, you want your horse to trot three-quarters of the way back to the jump before you ask for the change of direction, but calmness is top priority. If needed, prevent excess excitement after jumps by bringing him down to walk for a minute. Remember, the whole point of this exercise is to help your horse slo-o-o-o-ow down.

At some point within the first several crossings your horse might, on his own accord, begin cantering out of the jump... in a noticeably slower, more rhythmic and balanced canter. He will probably be able to maintain it for only three or four strides, and that's okay.

Those few steady strides are worth a thousand of the speedy, unbalanced ones. So allow him to return to trot on his own several times before pushing for more. 

Now, if your horse does not begin cantering out of the jump on his own, you can encourage him to by: a) driving the trot slightly faster a couple of steps before the jump; b) raising the high end of the pole a little higher; or c) raising the low end of the pole off the ground (just make sure you set it on a block so you won't have to wrestle the lunge line over a jump standard.) 

Once your horse is consistently cantering calmly out of the jump, start encouraging him to maintain his new canter for one or two more strides and return to trot only when you ask. Work toward getting him to maintain that steady canter for half the circle. 

Stay patient and reward often. Your horse is learning to carry himself in a whole new way and these things take time to develop.

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PREVENT DRIFTING OUT ON CIRCLES WITH COUNTER-FLEXION

A wise old woman once told me, “Where a horse’s head goes his body is sure to follow.” Hmm. Ever find yourself trying to circle to the right, but the harder you turn your horse’s head that direction the more his body drifts off to the left? Yeah... that woman was wise about a lot of stuff, but not so much horses’ heads.

If your horse is drifting out on circles, it is not his head you need to worry about, but rather his outside shoulder…the part of his body that is doing the drifting. Counter-flexion, or bending your horse opposite the direction of travel, will help you gain control of that outside shoulder. As with everything else, schooling counter-flexion in hand first makes it much easier to achieve in the saddle.

GET STARTED IN HAND:  As Madison demonstrates, begin by walking your horse toward a corner of the arena. Along the way, establish outside bend by turning your horse's head slightly toward you and placing your other hand in the girth area behind his shoulder… where your leg would lay if you were in the saddle. As you travel through the corner, encourage your horse to keep that bend to the outside.

On the first few attempts your horse will most likely try to take away the bend (as pictured below on the left), so be prepared to keep a firm hold on the lead rope/reins, and to apply as much pressure as needed at the girth. You’ll know you are getting somewhere when your horse begins stepping through the corner crossing the foreleg nearest you in front of the opposite one (as pictured on the right.)

As he begins making those crossing steps, your horse might feel tempted to stop or back up. Just give a little tap with a whip or lead rope to remind him to continue moving forward.

Practice until you can maintain counter-flexion through the corner with very little pressure.

Once you have mastered that, see if you can maintain it while turning your horse off the rail for four or five steps coming out of the corner. Then try turning your horse off the rail in counter-flexion well before reaching the corner.

When you get comfortable in one direction, switch to your horse's other side and school counter-flexion in the opposite direction.

As you proceed, keep in mind that your goal is to get your horse sensitive to your hand at his girth, and yielding through his shoulders when you apply light pressure. To master it, pick an object in the arena and practice maintaining counter-flexion as you circle around it.

TRANSITION TO THE SADDLE: Once you are in the saddle, your leg provides the necessary pressure at the girth rather than your hand. Take your horse through these same exercises at the walk, then pick up trot and begin asking for counter-flexion through the corners of the arena.

When you get it you will feel your horse's outside shoulder lift, providing a comfortable little space behind it for your thigh to lay. Its important you be aware of this because your thigh must remain in that comfortable spot for you to have effective use of your outside leg. 

When you begin schooling circles, anytime you sense your horse's shoulder moving your thigh out of position, apply counter-flexion and stronger outside leg. This will remind your horse to keep his outside shoulder in front of your leg... traveling on the arc of the circle rather than drifting out of it. Once you've regained control of that shoulder, work slowly toward establishing inside bend. 

Practice counter-flexion to prevent drifting and you will soon find that where a horse’s shoulders go his body is sure to follow. 

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AN OPEN LETTER TO HORSE INDUSTRY PROFESSIONALS

Dave McLean is a volunteer at a therapeutic riding center. Soft spoken and careful in actions as well as words, his entire demeanor reeks of gentleness. It was easy to sense the concern in his voice as he spoke.

“A long time ago,” he said, “I vowed that I would never hit a horse. Well… the other day, after getting bitten for the umpteenth time, I found myself swinging at one. Granted, I missed, but I would have hit him if he hadn’t backed away. The whole thing surprised me. I felt mad! I was uncomfortable with how angry I actually felt.”

Getting mad is better than getting bitten, but with a little guidance, Dave could have avoided both. Whose job is it to provide that guidance? In too many barns nobody knows, which is why a crazy number of people wind up in Dave's position. Whose job should it be to provide guidance to horse handlers? If your business involves clients or staff handling horses, it should be your job. Sure it should.

As a professional in the horse industry, one of the best things you can do for yourself is help your clients and staff understand what it takes to provide good leadership to horses. Allowing horses to behave unmannerly causes handlers to get hurt, but so many of them don’t realize that it also causes horses to suffer undue anxiety.

All horse handlers should learn what to expect from horses in the way of good ground manners, and how to correct behaviors when necessary. Providing this education at your barn saves your folks the trouble of having to seek it elsewhere, which many of them will. Like Dave, they will be inspired by the frustration with and/or fear of the horses they are handling.

When they come to people like me and start learning that all they needed all along was some basic leadership skills, they’ll put two and two together… you can count on it. And that’s when they’ll ask the same question so many have asked before, “Why didn’t anybody say anything about leadership skills in the first place?” 

For your own professional integrity, don’t give the people you do business with reason to ask that question! It’s hard for anyone to answer it without causing you to appear less than professional.

The horse handlers in your barn need good leadership skills for their own safety. Please trust that they would prefer you inspire them to develop some... and before they wind up getting bitten enough times to get angry with horses, or hurt enough time to become frightened of them. 

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Public Displays of Discipline are Nothing to Worry About

The other day I had a conversation with a gentleman who expressed concern about providing discipline to horses in front of other people. He didn't want anyone thinking he would ever mistreat a horse. That's a concern almost everyone has, including many professionals in the horse industry.  

Where is all this worry coming from when ninety-nine percent of the people passing through barn doors want to be kind to horses? The other one percent just wants directions to Starbucks.  

The worry comes from the fact that we are accustomed to thinking and speaking negatively about ourselves and other people. We all do it, but then we worry about others doing it to us. It's behavior exclusive to humans and totally counterproductive to happiness. We're hilarious, really. 

Discipline is part of the natural order of life for both humans and horses. Interesting thing about horses is, if one feels like you deserve some discipline it won't hesitate to provide it. Have you ever been bitten by a horse? Pushed out of the way? Kicked at? Well, there you go. You've been disciplined by a horse.

Did you notice the reprimand came fast and firm? Sure it did. Discipline is not something horses dillydally about or waste a lot of energy on.

Did you get the sense that the horse felt bad about reprimanding you? No, of course not. Horses don't bother themselves with feeling guilty about their actions. They are quite alright just learning from them.

Did other horses come running over to tell that horse he ought to be ashamed of himself for reprimanding you the way he did? Hardly. Horses will advocate on your behalf only if it provides immediate benefit to them. Meanwhile, they mind their own business.

I like the way horses approach discipline because they keep it plain and simple, never attaching remorse, shame or embarrassment to it. They are just straight and to the point. Don't hurt others and don't allow others to hurt you... it's a life lesson both humans and horses must learn to coexist peacefully with other beings. And we all learn it by hurting and getting hurt until we learn how to get it just right.

Trainers and riding instructors can only give their best guidance, but then they must get out of the way and let individuals start to figure out for themselves how to get it just right. What makes most people uncomfortable is seeing someone over-discipline a horse. That's what gets folks in an uproar and ready to jump on the social-media-public-shaming bandwagon. 

Before you are tempted to join in, know this. There's not a single great horse person in the world who hasn't done something they regretted. But you know what? That is how they learned best not to do it again. As a teaching tool, shaming anyone pales in comparison to letting folks learn from their own actions and providing them some empathy along the way. You are going to make your mistakes, too. To wit, lift up or shut up is a pretty good motto to live by.

To stay safe around horses, you've got to get over feeling bad about disciplining them when necessary... even if someone happens to be watching. You are responsible for yourself and your relationship with your horse at all times, not just when you are alone with him. 

Bear in mind that horses behave unmannerly mainly when they feel insecure. So, if you are chatting with another rider and your horse is stomping his hoof or nipping at you, he's basically wanting to know if you are still aware that you are supposed to be keeping him safe. Checking him on his manners right then and there reassures him that, yes, you are aware. It also sets a good example for the other rider... who might just be worrying about disciplining her horse in front of you.

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BREEDING AND BEHAVIOR: What's One Got to do With the Other?

Question:  How much of your horse’s behavior should you attribute to its breed?

Answer:  As much as serves you. Period.

Beliefs about horse breeds are one of those things that continually get in the way of riders having great relationships with their horses. Because breeding helps determine a horse’s physical characteristics (size and shape of body, the way the horse is naturally inclined to move, etc.) it has much to do with the type of work or sport for which a horse might be best suited. But, from what I’ve seen, breeding has very little to do with how a horse behaves while performing its work or sport.

One of my closest friends insists her horses are bred to be hot, so she regularly calls me out on this. “You can’t argue with genetics,” she claims. No, but you can certainly argue for your own limitations by holding onto beliefs that don’t help you get the behavior you want from your horse.

  

It’s natural to form preconceived notions about different horse breeds based on what we see, hear or read…especially when opinions come from those we consider more ‘in the know’ than ourselves. But when long-held beliefs become roadblocks on the path to success, why not question them? As free thinkers, we get to believe whatever we want. If your goal is to be happy in your relationship with your horse, only good things can come from dumping beliefs that don’t lead you in that direction.

 

Folks dealing with high-strung horses, including my friend, are rarely thrilled about believing their horses are genetically predisposed to behave like drama-queens about every little thing. Quite often they settle for feelings of resignation after suffering plenty of feelings of frustration. They resign themselves to dealing with unwanted behavior despite the fact that there is a lot of evidence to suggest they don't have to. Go see for yourself. Go watch horses while they are out in their pastures among other horses. You will see the Arabs and thoroughbreds behaving pretty much the same as quarter horses or drafts.

I personally believe that, given the opportunity, horses of all breeds will gladly behave calmly because high-anxiety is emotionally and physically exhausting. Being in a state of calmness just feels better, a lot better, than being in a state of nervousness or fright. So, if you’re thinking your ex-racehorse can't help behaving like a big bundle of nerves, do yourself a favor and rethink things. Chances are he is behaving that way only because you believe he has no choice.

Question your beliefs about your horse’s breed. Are you holding onto any that are holding you back? If so, let go! Challenge yourself to believe what makes you happy.

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Give your horse the opportunity to behave calmly for you by

ordering The ALPHA Equestrian Challenge today!